Imagine a Woman

Surviving life with, or in recovery from, an eating disorder is difficult even at the best of times. And for me, Christmas was the best of times! But anorexia cast a heavy shadow over the holidays for both me and my family, as the fear of all that decadent food and overbearing company eclipsed the traditional merriment. The joy of cookie swaps, Christmas cake magic, eggnog, and candy canes was no more. My waif-like presence drained the warmth from family gatherings. I could no longer summon any of my old exuberance at parties, tree-trimmings, sleigh rides, or pageants. My family tip-toed around me in fear of upsetting my fragile emotional state.

Even in the throes of my disease, I longed for the good old days when Christmas was a magical time of joy and lightheartedness. The season’s brightness was yet another thing my disease had robbed from me - and my case is not at all unique: the holidays are immensely challenging for many of those who struggle with an eating disorder. But as I’ve recovered, I’ve discovered a few tricks to retaining some of that holiday cheer, in spite of my chronic illness. While I admit that nothing can chase away those eating disordered thoughts entirely, there are a few ways to minimize the impact they have on holiday cheer. Today, I’m grateful that I can fully enjoy the whole Christmas season - even the sweets and treats - without losing out to anorexia.

This is a gift worth sharing - so for each of the Twelve Days of Christmas, we’ll be posting a new tip on surviving (even enjoying!) the holidays with an eating disorder on the Looking Glass' Facebook page. ‘Like’ us and follow along, beginning December 12th, and see how we’re keeping our holidays merry and bright.

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Alison is a regular contributor to The Looking Glass’ blog, is an eating disorders survivor and is an inspiration to those around her.

When you or someone you love has an eating disorder, food-centric holidays like Hanukkah, Thanksgiving and Christmas pose a particular challenge. The affected individual is likely to experience significantly greater stress knowing he or she will be expected to spend time with family and friends enjoying meals and holiday treats.

Through our work at the Looking Glass Foundation, we have developed several tips to help you enjoy the holiday season:

1) Taking care of yourself tops the list! Get enough rest, plan things you enjoy, stay close to your support system, and know your limits. The holidays can present us with opportunities to attend multiple gatherings in a week and it can be overwhelming, even for those without eating disorders. Journaling can be a good way to help you process feelings of isolation and anxiety and stay centered.

2) Plan ahead, make the challenges smaller, and take small steps. Isolating yourself to avoid food triggers can be tempting but it keeps you from growing and gaining confidence. You may want to host your own smaller gathering with foods you feel comfortable around rather than attend a big party somewhere else. You could plan to enjoy a serving of something you love but would not normally eat. You’ll know whether a step is right if it’s more appealing than worrying.

3) Divert your attention. There are so many ways to make the holiday season memorable. Wrapping presents, using your creativity to make a gift, lining up the holiday music, doing a favour for an elderly neighbour, and volunteering are ways to remember that gratitude is healing and at the heart of our holidays.

4) Know who to call if you find yourself in the occasional crisis. You may have moments when you feel particularly alone with your inner struggle. If you have a close friend or relative who understands, make a plan to be in touch. It can be as simple as a morning walk together, a phone call, email or texting for the understanding and encouragement you need. Or you can keep in touch with your therapist or join an online support group if needed. If you’re struggling and don’t know where to turn, contact the Looking Glass Foundation for Eating Disorders here for compassionate support and guidance.

Remember, you are not alone. Many others are facing eating disorders, and as you move forward with your own recovery, you are demonstrating to others that they, too, will succeed.

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Trixie Hennessey, MSW, RSW, is our wonderful, ultra talented Program Coordinator at The Woodstone Residence. To learn more about the transformational work being done at the Woodstone Residence, click here.